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Monologue Mania Day #277 by Janet S. Tiger Losing Friends Nov. 16, 2014
Note - This is for all the wonderful friends I've lost, and for all the wonderful friends I still have!
Losing Friends
A monologue by Janet S. Tiger © all rights reserved [email protected]
(A woman of indeterminate age is waiting, shopping bags in one hand. She is getting more impatient, tapping her heel. Pushes buttons on a cell phone, no response. Suddenly she stops and turns to the audience.)
Losing friends. You forget how hard it can be. The worst of course is when they die. Then they are really gone. I mean, you can still talk with them in your head, but you have to imagine what they'd say in response, and that can be tricky.
And then there's the loss of friendship - when someone just stops talking to you. For either a good reason, like my friend Angie found out her best friend Liz was having an affair with Angie's husband. That will constitute an understandable reason. Of course, until Angie found out, they were still friends, or were they? Was it just a fake friendship, like in Hollywood?
Anyhow, they don't talk anymore, except to me, which is how I know these things. But sometimes a friend stops talking to you for no good reason that you can figure out. You're not sleeping with her husband, and she's not sleeping with yours, you live in different cities, so you couldn't have snubbed her in the mall......so, they stop calling, and answering letters and email and they're...gone. Not dead, you check with the children, who don't understand either, but it doesn't matter, since you were never that friendly with the children either. So, no friend. Which, as you get older, you start to miss. And you have to make new friends of younger people, many of whom you have nothing in common with except that you both love cute cat videos.
And then, the other way to lose a friend....(gets upset).....at the mall!
I have been waiting....
(Looks at her watch, shakes her head)
For over thirty minutes! My friend Bobbie is always late! She was late this morning when I picked her up and she was in her own house for God's sake! I swear, she'll be late for her own funeral...(stops) I mean, I guess she if she's late for her own funeral that means she won't be dead, right? So that would actually be good. I mean, I certainly do not want to lose another friend to the grim reaper, that's for sure.....
(Puts her bags down, looks around)
But this is just...late! And she won't answer her cell phone, either! Can't figure out how it works! I knew I should never have left her in that store alone, but she loves those gadgets and I just wanted to see the new cute cat store and ....(totally exasperated)...where the hell is she?
Of all the ways to lose friends, this may not hurt, but it is certainly the most annoying!
And I was very clear, I told her very carefully, wait by escalator number 63, how hard is that? I picked 63 because it's near the bathroom and a safe place to wait...I even wrote it down on a piece of paper!
(Listens, looks up)
63...you're right, this is...... 36....oh, my God....I'm late!
(She runs off and we hear her...)
I'm sorry! ooh, I'm sorry I got lost.....
(She stops, looks back)
(Relieved) At least I didn’t lose another friend…maybe I’m just losing my mind!
(She exits. Never the end of true friendship)
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Janet S. Tiger 858-736-6315
www.JanetSTiger.weebly.com
Member Dramatists Guild since 1983
Playwright-in-Residence Swedenborg Hall 2006-8 --------------------------------------------------------